After much deliberation and soul searching I have come to terms with certain indecisions I have been facing. The indecisions were on how much I wanted to share of myself when it comes to my writing. Right now I have nothing to lose only more to gain. I have decided I wanted to share myself to my fullest expression and that means I need to write about what I want to write regardless of what I think readers want to hear or not. I need to be authentic. I am most authentic when I just write what comes to mind. Honestly, that could mean anything because I am a person passionate about life. I am curious and appreciative of the world around me. I stop to smell the roses. I stop to watch the bunny nibble in the grass. I honor the sun as he rises for the day. I honor the moon as she rises for the night. I am grateful for all that there is and all that there is to come.
This past week has been a wild ride... literally. Say Hello to Merope. She is my new spaceship I'm going to use to glide through the galaxy here on earth. She is the vehicle that will take me on magical journeys to music festivals and beyond. I am so grateful.
The name Merope came to me, but only because I could not remember the names of the other sisters of Pleiades besides Electra off the top of my head. I love Greek and Roman mythology. I actually love all mythology. It was only fitting I give myself a pen name that also resonated with that love.
I am a seeker of knowledge and truth. For the past 10 years I locked myself away in my room studying for the same engineering licensing exam that I took 7 times and still have yet to pass. I do not want to say I am giving up, but it is not what my true inner being wants from life experience right now. It wants me to ditch the books and get out and play. Explore the world and share my experiences through my writing. Express myself and let my light shine bright. I feel like I have been hidden under a rock and in a dark place. Wasting my talents for what? A decent paying job that gives me health insurance? That was literally all civil engineering was offering me at that time. The passion was gone. The environment and people were not suiting me anymore. I had outgrown the industry. I feel like I soaked up all there was to do and even though the projects were different and challenging, I felt like I had "been there done that" a dozen times over. Another subdivision? Another road? Another stormwater system?
My new path faces a ton of uncertainty and that is OK. I have followed not only my intuition, but started using my logic on how I can use my values, passions, loves, and strengths to turn them into a career. It takes time to build anything of value and that's what I'm doing - taking my time.
I have neglected myself for so long just focusing on trying to be someone I'm not- someone working in an office on a schedule. I can't say "I don't want to be an engineer anymore" because that's not how things work. I will always be an engineer because that it part of my identity. There are actual things built here on this earth that I designed. I'm super proud of that accomplishment and of myself.
Let your light shine bright && always follow your heart.
xo,
Elektra
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